Wednesday, May 7, 2008

Louma kikhat selung tuaklou!


Zodawn Tulliim


FACING A PROBLEM

FACING A PROBLEM
[21.03.08]



Problems abound. They seem to increase in their complexity and complication every passing day. Not a day dawns without at least a problem or two. No one on earth is faced with no problems. The moment you (think you) solve your problems another problem pops up almost at the same instant. And the next problem always seems graver, trickier and harder to crack than the previous one. Says Shiv Khera, the world renowned Indian inspirational speaker and author: “If you are not part of the solution, you are part of the problem.”
But, can problems be solved?
No!
Problems cannot be solved.
Amused? Preposterous? Incredulous?
Then, what can we do with our problems? Do we tuck them away somewhere? Shy away from them? Or just avoid them? Well, we all would apparently go for the last choice if it were possible. Sadly though, the more you try to avoid it, the more tenacious the problem sticks. It is therefore obvious that problems are not to be solved. Problems in life are not like problems in Science or Mathematics. The latter problems are tackled and ultimately solved! They never come back while the former ones recur.
What are a student’s problems, anyway?
Failure.
Fear of failure itself.
Ever increasing stress level.
A big job-hurdle staring straight at his face in this cutthroat world of competition poised like a hungry shark with a gaping jaw ready to bite off his head (career). Not that non-students are faced with no problems, though. Only what I am saying is, a student who dares to dream is like a person who dives into a pool of merciless problems with spreadeagled tentacles to overpower him. Disheartening, you say?
You cannot solve all these big problems as listed above. They are simply not solvable. I know you want to make these problems disappear and be gone forever. But they will unfortunately never be gone for ever. You can make them disappear at least for some time, though. And that was what many people have mistaken as their problems being solved and done. That’s a disillusion. Pampering yourself with such a disillusion and daydreaming is the worst thing you can do about your problems. Your time is too precious to waste in such a misconception.
If you want your problems to go away, follow these steps scrupulously, in that order:
Face them.
Endure them.
Dare them.
[Dogged determination is the key].
A problem is like balloon. Outwardly formidable. Inside just gas that fizzles off once the thin rubber membrane is pricked. The only difference is you have to know where to prick in a problem while any place will do in a balloon.
Your competitive world may be your state or country today. But, in the near future, jobs would be so scarce that it will not only be All India Services but World Level Competitive Examinations that you are to vie. Green Cards, ever increasing foreign job opportunities that fill the ad columns of big newspapers everyday, etc. are clear indication to that trend. Don’t think I am spelling doom or discouraging you. I am just calling a spade a spade. The future is bleak but for those who could not face their problems in the right perspective.
Yes, problems are to be faced. Not to try to do them away with. For, they will certainly come back. Rather, you must face your problems and overcome them. It’s war. Either you overcome the problem or the problem overcomes you. This is the world of the winners. The winner takes it all. And the looser has to go extinct. Darwin’s theory has an eternal validity: Survival of the fittest. You must have obstacles for survival. That’s nature’s law. And nobody can break or manipulate (to his own favor) the rule of nature. In fact, the question of survival will not not arise if there were no problems to surmount.
To survive means: to live or exist beyond the death, occurrence, or end of; outlive; outlast. (The New International Webster’s Comprehensive Dictionary of the English Language, p.1263). It does not mention anything like extermination or elimination of the adversary. It also does not say anything like solving the problem to survive either. It is only to last longer than (through endurance, persistence, and perseverance) the enemy (problem). In essence, it is to overcome and outlast the problem. Problems will never go away. They have been with us since the birth of time. But they will surely wear away. And resurface somewhere sometime to bother you again. Then you will have to do the same thing over again, i.e., overcome it……That’s life.
The question you will ask, now, is obvious and expected: How will I face, bear, and dare a problem?
Simple.
1. First, cool off steam. Anger, frustration, fear, nervousness, disappointment, etc. are all negative thoughts that only add anxiety and velocity to your already pulsating heart. Excess adrenaline may cause your heart to beat out of tune. So, don’t fume. Calm down. It will not be easy. Who says it will be easy, stupid. Just-calm-down.
2. Analyze. Where do you stand vis-à-vis the problem? Which of you (you or your problem) have the advantageous position (in your opinion)? The Israelites saw only the giant-ness, ferocity, and invincibility of Goliath. David saw the impossibility of missing such a big target so exposed! So what? Change your view or attitude.
3. Jot down points on how to face and overcome the problem. Give yourself lots of alternatives. Consider the best option. But remember to put a backup step so that when you accomplish the first step you can slowly tone down to the next step of anti-climax. The second step (not a substitute to step one) is akin to a retreat camp where soldiers relaxed after winning the war and prepare to come back to a normal life again.
4. Follow your guideline without looking back. Be resolute and gritty. Waver not. It’s you or your problem that has to go. The choice is yours.
Problems are sure to be difficult. Don’t think that dealing with a problem will be easy even though how much good idea you might have evolved to face it. By its very nature, a problem is difficult. Napoleon once ranted at his generals: “Don’t tell me that the problem is difficult. If it were not difficult, it will not be a problem.” Some people do get really hurt. Some are injured for life. And those who don’t make it commit suicide. And the problem has its day!
In supplement to the measure suggested above, one of the best ways to overcome a problem is to learn from nature’s creatures. This may be your second step if you can’t make out your own better one. A chameleon does not make its surroundings cool but adjusts its body temperature according to the heat. Adapt to the (hostile) environment and let not the adverse effects maim you. Be at peace, do the needful sincerely, and leave the rest to God. Peace is not the absence of problems. Rather it’s a state of tranquility in the midst of turbulence raging all around.
Victory is ours for we have been assured:
There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.
— 1 Cor 10:13 KJV
WHO IS YOUR “YOU”?
[19.03.08]



Everything I do, I do it for you…..
Sounds like a casual love song Bryan Adams huskily cooed for someone special? But I see a gem of a lesson here for students to learn. Notice that “you” Adams crazily dedicated his song to must not be an ordinary one. She must have been someone for whom he was ready to give up his everything.
A student’s is a stage in life where he is flooded with many “you’s”. We have many “you’s” and we are also someone’s “you” as well. We are so overwhelmed with those “you’s” that we sometimes get washed away by the wrong “you” at the wrong time and for all the wrong reasons. In fact, those wiser ones who could make out a definite “you” in their student’s life are the ones who make it.
Here, what I am hinting at is that you must make your own “you”. Sincerely. You may choose someone you highly admire or even adored and worshipped. Whom do you want to make your “you” today? Your parents? Brother or sister? Grandparents? A friend? A mentor? Your class teacher? Perhaps, your boyfriend/girlfriend? Your “you” can even be as simple as a dream, a burning desire to achieve a certain goal. Or even the whole world? A longing to offer compassionate service to humanity, the less fortunate, orphans, or the diseased. It can be your motherland — patriotism. Or you may want to lay the soul of a deceased loved one at peace by accomplishing your promise! Yes, even a promise will do for “you”.
Whatever be the case, what we want here is that you must have a model “you” after which you must inspire yourself. After all, you must be your own encourager, motivator and inspirer. Appoint your own “you” scrupulously. No one is going to impose a “you” for you. In essence, you must be a self-starter. All successful men in the world have this ‘self-starter’ syndrome as the foremost quality in their life. They never depend on someone or something to move forward. But, the secret of this “self-starter” is a “you” that shines like a tiny light at the end of the tunnel which they badly want to impress.
Once you set your “you”, there is not space for faltering. The vision became clear. The lenses are focused and the picture sharp. The aim is straight and not a prospect of missing the target in sight. I don’t mean that we become infallible in having “you”. But, even when we are offbeat our “you” is too much to disappoint and we are very much indisposed to let her down that we spring back to our feet and press on — correcting and fixing up all those blunders and bungles along the way.
“You” prodded us on when we are worn and down, motivated us when we are discouraged, and refreshed us when we are confounded. Indeed, our faith (even in ourselves) wavered and dissipated sometimes. But “you” is the best recharge coupon when our balance of willpower, effort and commitment run low.
We are hell bent on making our “you” proud. We are determined against all odds to make your “you” stand tall. You have no time to spare to pine and sigh. Frustrations and failures, that previously are threatening you to give up, now become stepping stones and signposts toward future attainments. Lethargy, boredom, laxity and any negativity that can hamper our raging endeavor stand no chance against our devotion to “you”.
Pessimism, apprehensions and anxiety are things of the past for we realized that they are only agents of failure. And confidence is the only weapon that can fight these dark forces back. “You” teaches us carefulness and prompt. We avoid overconfidence and skirt those many avoidable mistakes due to carelessness and indolence. And thereby ensure unto ourselves the coveted crown of success.
The road to education and success is rough. The risk is high. And the pathways treacherous. There are no shortcuts. The long journey toward this destiny called success is so tiresome that many people could not make it and buckled sometimes at the very threshold of the finishing point. But, remember, success is a process and not the end. Sounds self contradictory, huh! Don’t get caught up in this disillusion. You can only pass by success, but never come to it. You move on. And your “you” also moves on……That means, your “you” also (has to) change accordingly (but not necessarily). Change is an integral part of life. Success is only a change for the better. Keep on changing — for the better. That is what we call success. And the person or thing behind each success that you called “you” will all the more deserve the devotion and greatness you crazily ascribe. Enough of this digression. But I’ll not get back to the point to remind you that you must have a “you” to inspire you all along the way.
Who is your “you” anyway?
One giant billboard I saw in a busy Kolkata street side reads: We all change for the ones we love…How true. But we must change for the better! And say everything I do I do it for you………….